NECESSARY ENDINGS, A PART OF EVERY LIFE
by: Dr. Beverly Puzia, Ph.D.
July 22, 2021
Sharing my thoughts and feelings at another transition of my life gives me opportunity to once again evaluate the basics of who I am, why and I here, and what is most important.
Major transitions in my life have included living in South Africa from age 6 to 12, getting married at age 21, having two children by 24, starting work as a church administrator at age 30, starting my career as a counselor at age 51, moving from Illinois to South Carolina at age 63, becoming a widow at age 66, marrying again at age 69, and closing a counseling office in Illinois at age 80. Each one of those events meant something was ending and something was beginning.
Incidentally, the paragraph above is an outline of telling your story and finding how we tend to negotiate transitions in life. Research reveals that how we handle transitions is indicative of how healthy or mature we are becoming. Most endings imply there might be a new beginning.
Coming to a confident conclusion of who I am is the beginning of making necessary endings the transition to new beginnings. The ability to see that I have value and worth, not because of what I do, but because of Who’s I am. I am a child of God, made in His image and He alone has the right and the power to define my value and worth. Psalm 139 is wonderful place to begin, especially verses 13 to 18.
Pondering the question of why I am here often comes out of those necessary endings. Can we look at the transitions or chapters of our lives and see the story unfolding? Every event in our life is a part of the story of God recorded by God in my behalf. How has He prepared me for this time? For this new beginning? What have I been able to end, say no to so that I might begin and know what to say yes to?
Months after I was widowed while at a workshop with Dr Sandy Wilson, she chose me to be her person to work with in dealing with transitions in life. She had no idea that I had been recently widowed. We had a chance meeting a few minutes before the workshop began and asked if I would be comfortable if she used me. We took Psalm 131 and walked through each verse. Try it and personalize this chapter and at the end insert your name where Israel is.
“O Bev, put your hope in the Lord—now and always.” Psalm 131: 3 Therein is the secret to handling the necessary endings and new beginnings of life.